Anal sex can be an extremely pleasurable experience , but it's important to keep a few things in mind to ensure you enjoy it safely and satisfactorily.
If you like to try new things in bed, you're not alone.
Although anal sex is often considered taboo, many women love this form of sex and why shouldn't they? After all, they have every right to sexual pleasure!
If your adventurous side has put anal sex on your wish list and you're wondering if it's a safe or good option for you - don't worry!
Here you will find support for your questions.
In fact, very few people know how anal sex works properly.”
This article is about sensual anal sex with your partner. We try to take both the woman's and the man's perspective into account.
We'll give you tips and tricks on how you can have an all-round pleasurable experience while playing sex games with the back door and still leave nothing unattended when it comes to safety.
We also talk about topics like lube , condoms and pain during penetration .
We'll also show you how to bring your partner to orgasm and which positions are best for anal sex.
Read on to learn anal stimulation and penetration
Which women like anal sex?
Image source: Freepik
One in three women have experienced intercourse in the doggy-style position. This is the finding of a 2015 study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine , which examined heterosexual and sexually active women between the ages of 15 and 44.
Although this finding is interesting in itself, the study revealed other insightful results.
This survey of 10,463 women found that 36 percent of them had had anal sex at least once in their lives. However, only 13 percent of women surveyed said they had done this within the last twelve months. At first glance it almost seems as if the majority of women did not find this act particularly exciting.
According to the research, it turns out that a certain type of women is more likely to try rear position sex : non-religious, well-educated women in their 20s with a high income.
Furthermore, women who are married or already in a relationship tend to have anal sex more often than single people.
In addition, according to the study, women who have already had experience with another woman, suffered from a sexually transmitted disease or had their first time before their 16th birthday are also more open to anal sex.
Enjoying anal sex – the prerequisites for a relaxed and enjoyable experience
Image source: gpointstudio, via Freepik
Good preparation is the be-all and end-all for a relaxed and enjoyable anal sex experience. Women in particular need time to prepare for the penetration of the penis or a toy into the anus.
Dr. med. Britta Bürger , together with a well-known gynecologist on NetDoktor , names important requirements to make sexual intercourse from behind an enjoyable experience.
Gynecologist Dr. Sheila de Liz emphasizes right at the beginning:
With proper preparation, you can avoid pain during anal sex and instead have a lot of fun.”
For this reason, you should pay attention to the following aspects:
Mutual consent – Both must be interested in anal sex
It's common for women to try anal sex out of consideration for their partner.
They feel fear and tense up - this makes it a pleasant experience for neither him nor her.
For this reason, both partners should discuss their intentions in advance and openly express their fears and concerns. Anal sex can only be fun if both of you really want it and think the idea is great.
Anal sex takes time and patience
Anyone who thinks that it is easy to insert the male penis into the woman's posterior genital organ is completely wrong.
The doctor suspects that many men might recognize this from porn films. However, the actresses have usually completed years of training for this. “An ordinary woman should never want to compare herself to them ,” explains de Liz.
Therefore:
Take your time with anal sex and proceed carefully!”
Our tips, which are described in the article below, can help here. An important point is choosing the right lubricant to avoid pain and provide pleasant stimulation.
Communicating with your partner about desires and boundaries also very important to ensure a safe and satisfying experience.
With slow movements and gently increasing stimulation, the orgasm can be particularly intense.
hygiene tips safe sex measures should be observed to guarantee clean pleasure.
Relaxation techniques can also help both partners enjoy anal sex.
Careful aftercare is also important for healthy intimacy between both partners.
Overall, it shows: Preparing for anal sex is at least as important as the act itself - with the best tips, nothing stands in the way of a sensual experience!
Preparing for Anal Sex – A Must Do
Unfortunately, the sex podcast Oh, Baby! by gynecologist Dr. Sheila de Liz is no longer on air. However, all episodes can still be found on YouTube.
Fortunately, the experts also revealed to the women's magazine ELLE ("Anal sex without pain") a whole series of essential preparations that you should definitely take into account before your first anal intercourse.
01 Pre-stretch the anus
The sphincter is a circular muscle that closes the anus. When preparing for anal sex, it should first be gently stretched. It is very important to use plenty of lubricant.
butt plug from the sex shop be used to stretch the sphincter These are available in two different sizes.
For beginners, it is recommended to choose the smaller plug. With enough lubricant, both the finger and the butt plug can be inserted into the anus.
The muscle should be given enough time - around two to five minutes - to adapt to the penetration of the foreign body and to stretch slowly.
If you work with fingers, you can then carefully insert a second finger. Here, too, it is important to wait and give the muscle time to get used to it before attempting to penetrate.
02 Lubricant – More is more
A generous amount of lubricant provides pleasant stimulation of the anus and makes penetration of the penis or other toys easier.
De Liz recommends not being skimpy when using lube: "If you feel like it's too much, then it's probably just enough."
Take your time during foreplay and enjoy the moment together with your partner - nothing stands in the way of sensual anal sex!
Choosing the right lubricant also plays an important role during anal sex. Without adequate moisture, pain and injury can occur, marring the experience.
But which lube is best for anal sex?”
Here are some tips to pay attention to. Use a water-based lubricant as this will not interfere with condom use and is easily washable.
A silicone-based lubricant is a little more difficult to remove from the skin and is therefore a second choice. Oil-based gels are not recommended as they can damage condoms.
Also make sure that the lubricant you choose skin-friendly and does not cause allergic reactions .
03 Hygiene: Showering or anal douche?
In order to avoid unwanted dirt, it is often recommended to do an anal douche or an enema . The rectum is rinsed with lukewarm water using a small rubber bulb and an attached hose.
It is advisable to insert the tube with lubricant. Dr. Sheila de Liz, on the other hand, warns against this because the liquid from the enema can drip - which is also very unpleasant. It is better to make sure that you have already had a bowel movement on the day of the incident to ensure that the rectum is clean.
04 Safer Sex First – condoms are mandatory
It is highly advisable for every couple to definitely use a condom during anal sex.
This is because there is not only a particularly rapid possibility of transmission of HIV, but also of other viral diseases such as hepatitis, fungi and genital warts.
This is because the mucous membranes in the anus area are very thin and sensitive, explains de Liz.
Another benefit of using condoms is that the penis stays clean.
If the couple wants to have vaginal intercourse afterwards, you don't have to wash extensively - just change the condom.
It can be extremely risky to your health to move from anal to vaginal or even oral intercourse without washing thoroughly or changing condoms.
The bacteria in the anus could cause a woman to get a bladder infection or worse.
05 video tutorials from Miss Minzbonbon
From tender to wild: tips and tricks for sensual anal sex with your partner
Communication is the be-all and end-all: talking about wishes and boundaries
Open and honest communication is particularly important during anal sex. Especially when it comes to wishes and boundaries, you should talk to your partner and take time to express your own needs.
Both partners should treat each other with respect and not be afraid to express their wishes.
The topic of pain should also be addressed, as pain can occur during anal sex if not enough lubricant is used or the penis penetrates the anus too quickly or too roughly. To avoid this, it is advisable to allow sufficient time for stimulation and preparation before anal intercourse.
Don't apply pressure
Women should never be pressured or persuaded to have anal sex. It is important that a woman feels the desire on her own and does not feel like she has to do it.
Anal sex should not be viewed as a sign of love. A man may enjoy taking his partner in this way, but he should not expect any reward.
Only if both partners have jointly decided to try it out can a woman possibly enjoy it and fully commit to it.
The right mood
Sexual activities are highly dependent on mood. It's not only important to feel like having sex, but also to be in the right frame of mind. This also applies to anal sex.
You can't just decide: "We'll do it on the weekend." Both partners have to feel that now is the right time for anal penetration.
Sexual desire cannot simply be decided, it must develop gradually and this requires time and the right atmosphere.
It is important that you always take this time. This way, a woman can be ready for anal sex and enjoy it to the fullest - an absolutely exciting experience for both partners.
Choose a suitable location
It may not sound particularly exciting, but for many women, the bed is the preferred location for their first anal sex .
Even if a woman is adventurous and likes to try it outside or in the car, the bed is often preferred for anal sex.
Here you feel comfortable and safe, it is comfortable and no one bothers you. Here the woman can let go and have new erotic experiences together with her partner.
If the location isn't right, the anal sex experience will be more difficult, especially the first time. It's not just about pleasure itself, but also about exploring and shaping the path to your goal well.
This can prevent horniness from turning into pain and make the experience unforgettable. Only then will both partners continue to be interested in anal stimulation - possibly even in unusual places.
The woman sets the pace and length
“It is common for men to have difficulty penetrating the anus ,” explains de Liz, adding: “Many people jump straight to it. However, that is not correct.”
At the beginning, the penis should proceed carefully and the woman clearly takes the lead!”
If it's going too fast or something feels uncomfortable, it's time to stop.
The art of anal stimulation: Start slowly, increase gently”
A particularly important rule when it comes to anal sex is to start slowly and increase gently.
The art of anal stimulation lies in taking time to prepare and proceeding carefully. Women in particular often need more time and patience than men to get used to the penetration of a penis or toy into the anus.
The couple can then increase the speed or try deeper penetration.
Toys and toys for even more pleasure during anal sex
Image source: Freepik
For many couples, anal sex is a special type of intimacy and can be a very fulfilling experience. To increase pleasure, anal toys be a worthwhile addition.
There are many anal toys on the market. small vibrator or anal dildo is often recommended to increase the stimulation inside the anus.
Anal dildos are usually a little more compact than conventional models. This toy stimulates both the internal and external anus. An anal vibrator, on the other hand, has an even more intense effect and also helps relax the sphincter.
Butt plugs are usually used primarily for pre-stretching, but can also be used for stimulation.
Men can benefit from a prostate massager that specifically stimulates the area around the prostate, allowing for a more intense orgasm.
The most popular toys for anal sex are dildos and butt plugs . To increase the woman's anticipation, love balls or an anal beads be very worthwhile.
The latter consists of a chain to which different sizes of beads or balls are attached. This makes it possible to gradually stretch the anus and gradually get used to larger sizes.
Important note : Only items with a smooth and rounded shape should be used. Since the muscles of the intestines tend to pull things upwards, only objects that cannot disappear upwards and can be easily removed should be inserted into the anus.
Relaxation techniques
A relaxed posture is especially important when it comes to anal sex. It can be intensely enjoyable for women and men alike, but it can also be painful if preparation is not adequate.
Therefore, it is of utmost importance to take time and prepare the body for penile penetration.
A good way to do this is through relaxation techniques such as deep breathing or yoga exercises.
These can help relieve muscle tension in the anal area and therefore provide a more pleasant experience during anal sex. But it's not just the body that needs to be relaxed - the mind should also be free of stress and worries .
Nail care
Let's talk about fingernails because it's all too easily overlooked.
It is important that these are short and rounded. Otherwise, even the gentlest massage can be uncomfortable or even cause injury.
Another helpful measure is to put a condom on your finger or fingers.
Anal orgasm possible?
Contrary to popular belief, anal orgasms are actually possible. If you live with the idea that anal sex can't be as pleasurable as vaginal sex, you might be wrong.
A sex survey published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine found that women who had anal sex reported higher orgasm rates than women who had vaginal sex.
In order to achieve an anal climax, it usually requires more than just the pure stimulation of the anus. Therefore, you should never neglect your partner's other erogenous zones .
Don’t forget aftercare – care after lovemaking
After sensual anal sex, you should not forget that the anus also needs special care. Clean yourself thoroughly and, if necessary, use a special intimate hygiene kit .
A cooling cream can also relieve pain in the anal area.
Please note: Body fluids do not remain in the anal canal. Everything that has entered the body must come out of the body again - regardless of whether it is ejaculate or air.
The 5 best positions for anal sex
When practicing anal sex, you are not limited to a specific sex position. However, there are some positions that are better suited to backdoor traffic than others.
The men's magazine Men's Health recommends the following sex positions:
01 Doggy style
The doggy style, also “a tergo” , is the classic anal sex position and is particularly suitable for beginners.
While one person kneels on all fours in the doggy position and supports themselves with their hands, the partner kneels behind him/her. The position allows the passive part to have a relaxed posture and the active part to penetrate deeply.
02 The Matterhorn
Here, the passive person kneels with their legs apart in front of a stack of pillows and rests their hands on them so that their upper body is tilted at a 45-degree angle.
While the active partner penetrates her from behind, the kneeling person can easily control the pace and angle with small movements.
Particularly suitable for women as the active partner can easily reach and stimulate her clitoris in this position.
03 Rider position
Here the man lies relaxed on his back while the partner sits astride the person lying down.
Whoever sits on top has control over how quickly and deeply the member penetrates the anus. Those who lie down not only enjoy a good feeling, but also have a stimulating view.
04 Spoons
The spooning position is a very sensual sex position that automatically creates a relaxed and intimate atmosphere. Very suitable for anal sex newbies!
The active part lies behind the partner in a kind of hug. Both of them bend their legs a little and they are now in the perfect starting position.
05 Sex while standing
This position is more suitable for advanced users. Both stand behind each other, whereby the passive person can support themselves on a wall or a sofa for more stability and push their butt backwards.
The rest will take care of itself...
What happens after anal sex?
After you have had anal sex, you should be careful not to have vaginal sex. This is because infections in the vagina can occur due to intestinal germs. However, after cleaning there is no longer any risk.
Please also note: Body fluids do not disappear into the anal canal. Everything that goes into the body has to be taken out of the body again - regardless of whether it is ejaculate or air.
What problems can occur after anal sex?
NetDoktor (see link above), after the first experiences, the sphincter muscle may be irritated, which can lead to, for example, loss of control over the release of flatulence or the semen flowing out uncontrollably.
This type of temporary “incontinence” usually only lasts one to two days. As you become more routine with anal sex, the slight irritation decreases.
Dangers and risks
If done correctly, no permanent damage is expected during anal sex. However, some potential dangers and risks that could arise if done improperly should be noted.
If anal sex is not performed gently enough, injuries occur. These include pain , bleeding and tears (fissures) . In the worst case scenario, a damaged sphincter muscle to fecal incontinence .
Women in particular have an increased risk of this. This is due to their anatomy as well as the effects of hormones, pregnancy and childbirth on the pelvic floor. Their sphincter is therefore less resilient and they are more likely to suffer injuries during anal sex due to their weaker connective tissue.
Without a condom , anal sex poses a particular risk of transmitting diseases such as hepatitis , syphilis (syphilis) , gonorrhea or AIDS . also increases the risk of cancer in the anal area as a result of infections.
The Men's Health editorial team (see link to article above) has taken the trouble to separate the circulating myths from the facts when it comes to risks and dangers:
Inflammation of the bladder and urethra
Caution is advised when switching from vaginal to anal. Although the bacteria in the intestines are not dangerous, they should not enter the vagina. If they reach the entrance to the urethra, a painful bladder infection occur.
So before changing, you should use a new condom or clean the penis thoroughly with soap and water. By the way, men can also urethritis from anal sex.
The same precautions apply here as for women.
STDs
Even when having sex through the anus, a condom is the most effective method of protecting yourself from sexually transmitted diseases.
Even small injuries to the sensitive mucous membranes can spread infections, including HIV.
That's why it's better to be careful than to have to regret it later!
Worn out sphincter
It is unlikely that the sphincter muscle can become worn out due to anal intercourse.
According to Men's Health, there is no scientific evidence to support this. We at Dating-Vergleich would like to contradict this at this point.
Unfortunately, there are repeated reports of damage and permanent fecal incontinence if the anus has not been sufficiently stretched.
According to a study published in the American Journal of Gastroenterology, women who regularly practiced anal sex were more likely to report fecal incontinence later in life. That is, they had difficulty controlling their bowel movements.
Caution is therefore advised and one should not carelessly skip the careful and gentle pre-stretching of the sphincter.
Rectal prolapse
A rectum that is turned inside out is not exactly an aesthetic idea, but there are numerous rumors circulating about it. However, there are no serious research reports about it.
Rectal prolapse is extremely rare and when it does occur, it is probably not caused by ordinary anal intercourse, but rather by “extreme” anal practices.
